The Royals: Alexander and Clara: Volume One (The Royals Saga) Read online

  “Oh darling.” Belle brushed a stray lock of hair behind my ear and wrapped her arms around me. “Today is not about him. You worked really hard to get here.”

  She was right. I couldn’t let Alexander ruin this for me. If I really wanted to prove I was independent, that I didn’t want him, I had to stand on my own two feet and do it.

  “I’m going to kill myself in these heels,” I said, ready to talk about anything else.

  “Nonsense. Those heels are tame,” she reminded me.

  I laughed when I considered the sky-high stilettos she’d convinced me to purchase for nights on the town. Apparently she didn’t fear mixing alcohol and footwear as much as I did.

  “I need to get going.”

  “Here.” Belle shoved a bag in my hand. “Lunch.”

  “Thanks, Mom,” I said, pecking her on the cheek.

  “No excuses. Take a lunch break. I don’t want you to work yourself to death!”

  Smiling as I closed the door to the flat behind me, I realized I had someone watching out for me after all.

  

  My desk consisted of a small table crammed into a cubicle as far from the window as possible, and I loved it. I had earned that desk and the small name plate that my new boss had presented to me upon my arrival. That was what I couldn’t explain to my parents or to Belle: the sense of pride at having worked for something. I loved them all dearly, but it was something they just couldn’t fathom.

  “The facsimile machine is in here,” Bennett explained to me as I followed him through the office. I was pleased that hardly anyone gave me a second glance. My brief moment of notoriety seemed to be a distant memory to everyone. Of course, maybe they weren’t as in tune with the breaking stories of TMI and other less dignified news organizations. Serious work was done here.

  “We’re about to start a campaign with Isaac Blue’s foundation to raise awareness about drinking water safety in Africa. I know you have some experience working with the well-known...” Bennett trailed away as soon as he saw my face.

  “Sorry,” I choked out, gesturing for him to continue.

  “When your parents sold their company, you spent some time in society circles,” he prompted, and I immediately felt foolish. Of course, that’s what he meant. We’d discussed my parents’ company during my interview. He would have done follow-up research.

  “I was a little too young to really remember that,” I admitted.

  “Don’t worry about it.” Bennett waved it off. “I’m just trying to warn everyone now because Isaac might be sitting in on some meetings and well...”

  “I get it,” I said with a smile. I couldn’t exactly blame the boss for wanting to let everyone know we were going to be working with one of the sexiest actors alive. A year ago, that news might have thrilled me. I probably would have rushed to text Belle as soon as I had a moment alone, but now it barely made a dent.

  Bennett welcomed me into his office and took his seat. I smiled when I saw the photograph he had of two identical blond-haired girls on his desk.

  “Abby and Amy,” he said with a broad smile. His affection for them was obvious. “They’re six going on eighteen.”

  “You must have your hands full,” I said, thinking of how much trouble Lola and I had caused when we were kids. We’d been born so close together that we’d acted like twins up until secondary school.

  Bennett tucked his hands behind his head and frowned. He was a good-looking guy in his early forties with salt and pepper hair and age lines that made him look distinguished. He was lucky to be aging well, but I guessed the twins were keeping him young. “When I was your age, I did this job because I idealized the world. Now that I have them, I do it because I don’t.”

  I nodded as if I understood.

  “Who are you doing this for?” he asked. “Do you have a significant other?”

  I swallowed against my dry mouth and shook my head. At least I knew he hadn’t heard about me and Alexander. There was no way he would have asked if he had. “Nope. I’m doing it for me.”

  “It’s as good a reason as any.” He shook his head and smiled at me. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to get all deep on you. I think I’ve been a little too philosophical since my wife died.”

  I stifled a gasp, even as my hand flew to my chest. I wasn’t sure if I hurt more for him or for the girls. I had a trying relationship with my mom, but at least she was around. “I’m so sorry.”

  “Thanks,” he said sincerely. “My therapist wants me to talk about it casually to others so that it becomes more real to me.”

  I couldn’t keep my face from screwing up at this bit of information. “Your therapist sounds like a dick.”

  As soon as it was out of my mouth, I wished I could swallow it back down, but it was too late. To my relief, Bennett dropped his head back and bellowed.

  “You know, Clara. You’re right. I thought the same thing, but everyone kept telling me I had to go and see him,” he said. “I should probably cancel my next appointment, huh?”

  “I guess if that’s the best he can do,” I said apologetically. “I’ve been here all of an hour, and I’m already butting into your personal life. I’m sorry.”

  “Don’t be. It was a refreshing change of pace. Everyone else here,” he dropped his voice to a whisper, “was around when she died. They treat me like I’m made of glass.”

  I knew what it was like to be deemed fragile. It became impossible to tell if you’d really break if you fell after a while. “I won’t treat you that way.”

  “You’re going to be hard on me then?” He looked at me hopefully.

  I cracked a smile. “You have no idea.”

  

  Despite Belle’s good intentions, my lunch left something to be desired, namely in the flavor department. So I grabbed my purse, thinking I might check out the chips shop on the corner. As soon as I stood, I felt eyes on me. The girl in the cubicle across from mine looked away as soon as I turned toward her. Two more people whispered in the corner and didn’t bother to hide their gaze. My cheeks flooded with heat. Maybe I’d been wrong about not being recognized. Digging my phone out of my purse to text Belle, I discovered I had a new email in my personal account. My heart stopped when I saw the subject line.

  The TeXXXts Prince Alexander Doesn’t Want You To See

  Eyes bored into me from every direction, and I willed the floor to open and swallow me alive. This was what I’d been desperate to avoid: attention. I scrolled through the story, fighting the urge to throw up. Bile rose in my throat as I saw the posted messages. They were all there, in all their explicit glory. Not only had someone hacked his account, they’d tracked the recipient of the messages: me. And to make certain there was no doubt that I was the Clara Bishop that had the Prince in a frenzy, they’d included a photo they must have snapped this morning when I left for the office. How hadn’t I noticed them there? Had I been that oblivious?

  Stuffing my phone back in my pocket, I lifted my head, determined to make a dignified exit. I would get lunch. I would forget this happened and it would all blow over. The first story had, after all, and there weren’t going to be any more. It was over between Alexander and me. But I hadn’t gotten two steps when my confidence faltered and I stumbled. Standing at the door to Peters & Clarkwell was Alexander.

  Chapter Thirteen

  It took me a few seconds to recover, but I regained my footing and strode toward him. What was he doing here? How did he even know I had started work? It had been days since I had seen him, and I’d never told him where I was going to be working. But despite his unexplained presence, I wasn’t surprised that Alexander had found his way to me. Behind me, the office buzzed as people realized who he was.

  So much for a normal work life.

  “What are you doing here?” I hissed under my breath. Crossing my arms across my chest, I did my best to look unhappy to see him. Inside I was anything but. God, he looked sexy. His hair disheveled, although I noticed that he had circles under his
eyes like he hadn’t been sleeping. Most likely he’d spent the last few days partying. He was dressed casually in a fitted t-shirt and jeans that hung off his hips like an invitation. My thoughts flickered to memories of us in bed and I caught my breath, hoping to calm my racing nerves, so he wouldn’t see his effect on me.

  “You’ve had long enough. I need to talk to you.” He stepped forward and took my arm in a gentle but assertive hold, leading me toward the building’s lift.

  Was he fucking serious? I’d had long enough?

  “Couldn’t you text me?” I asked with a sarcastic note to my voice.

  “I guess you saw that too.” Alexander dropped his hold on me as we entered the elevator, but as soon as the doors slid shut behind us, he pinned me against the wall.

  “Alexander!”

  “Why haven’t you answered my texts?”

  “The whole world can read that you want to go down on me on a gossip site and you’re worried about that?” I didn’t bother to hide my disbelief, because I was too busy focusing on keeping my body in check, even as it rebelled against me. It was all I could do not to arch into his embrace and kiss him. I wanted to brush away the fear I saw in his eyes and tell him everything would be okay. But it was as much a lie as my pretending I didn’t want him here with me.

  “I don’t give a damn what they can read!” he exploded, pushing off the wall and clenching his hands into fists. “Why do you care what they think, Clara?”

  “Me?” I touched my chest for emphasis. “You were the one who wanted to meet me in secret at a fucking hotel!”

  Alexander stared at me a moment, wheels turning in his head. “I did that to protect you. You were scared of the paparazzi.”

  “They were reporting we were in a relationship,” I reminded him. “And I didn’t know who you were at the time.”

  “We are in a relationship,” he said.

  My mouth fell open. I was torn between the bubbly, bouncy feeling of joy this produced in me and total confusion. Never mind that I’d called things off between us, things had never really gotten started. “We broke things off.”

  “You were overwhelmed and I gave you space, but did you think I would allow you to end things like that?” he asked. “I made it clear that I hadn’t had my fill of you.”

  “But you didn’t want to be seen with me,” I argued. “You can’t pick and choose when to be in a relationship!” I knew it was more complicated than that. I only wished it were that simple. There was too much for us to work through, especially when everything between us came on his terms.

  “I wanted to protect you.” Alexander turned back to me, trailing a finger down my face. “I didn’t want to scare you. I can do that all on my own.”

  I barked a short, humorless laugh as the lift doors opened. “You can at that.”

  “So is that what’s going on?” he asked, pulling me into a deserted alcove off the lobby. “A misunderstanding?”

  I wanted it to be that and nothing more, but the truth was there was a lot more going on. First of all, there was the mysterious Pepper Lockwood. He still hadn’t explained what was really going on with her to me, and then there was the proposition he’d put forth the last time we spoke. He wanted to dominate me. He wanted me to submit. I wasn’t sure I was capable of that. I wasn’t sure it was healthy.

  I shook my head, tears welling in the corners of my eyes. “I wish it was.”

  “You’re scared of me.” He spoke this like a realization not a question and dropped his hold on me in resignation. “I tried to warn you.”

  “Maybe I don’t understand,” I said softly. I couldn’t deny that I hadn’t stopped thinking about him, and I couldn’t deny how I felt now that he was here. Somewhere my rational side was shaking her head, but where had my rational side gotten me romantically? My body knew what it wanted, but could I trust it? Maybe it was time to listen to my heart.

  Alexander’s hand gripped my hip tightly, kneading into the flesh through my skirt, as though he was considering tearing it off me. I trembled at the touch, hungry for contact from him after so long. How could I deny how he made me feel? But I needed to think. I needed to know what I was getting into. There was no way I could choose whether or not Alexander had a place in my life until I did.

  “When I told you that I was protecting you from the reporters, how did you feel?” he asked.

  I was taken aback by the change in conversation, but I considered his question for a moment before answering. “I guess that—” I paused, breathing in deeply before I answered “—I felt safe.”

  “Why?” The question was a challenge. He was trying to help me understand his own reasoning. But it was more than that though. I could see in his eyes that he needed me to understand.

  “Because you care,” I realized.

  It was hard to explain to him that my parents often had been too caught up in business ventures to worry about how their lifestyle affected me. Instead, they knee-jerked, trying to control me. And then there was Daniel, which was a whole different mess. But there was also an element that I didn’t fully understand. The thought of Alexander protecting me publicly and privately didn’t stress me—not yet, at least. Not when I really considered it. Instead, it flooded through me like sudden heat. The more I thought about it, the more the warmth spread until I felt secure and safe.

  “I do care, Clara.” He leaned in so that our faces were at the same level and he stared into my eyes, unflinchingly. “I didn’t want you to experience being trashed by the press.”

  “So it wasn’t that you didn’t want to be seen with me?” I asked.

  “Have you looked in the mirror lately? I can only assume you haven’t, so let me describe what you look like right now. Clara Bishop has large, gray eyes with fluttering lashes and a button nose. That would be enough to make her pretty, but then she has these pouty lips that make me hard. Her hair is silky and soft, and no matter how much she tries to control it, there’s always some locks that escape to drift down her neck or blow across her face. I can’t help imagining letting it all down, watching it fall over her shoulders as she comes on my cock.” Alexander shifted, pressing me against the wall, so that I could feel his erection pushing into me. “She drives me crazy, and I honestly don’t care who knows it.”

  “But you don’t do relationships, Mr. X,” I said in a soft voice.

  “I don’t do romance,” he corrected, “but if you’ll let me, I will do pleasure.”

  “There’s no one else then, Mr. X?” I purposefully called him by the moniker he used at the hotel.

  “Too formal, poppet.”

  “Okay, then. There’s no one else then, X?”

  “I’m true to my word, Clara.” Darkness glinted in his eyes, turning the crystal blue to flinty steel.

  I shivered, remembering the last time I’d questioned his word. He’d threatened to spank me—one thing I knew that I couldn’t allow. “But you want to dominate me.”

  I couldn’t claim to be an aggressive person. At times, like so many women I knew, I took the passive route, preferring to avoid confrontations. But I could be assertive, too. The one thing I couldn’t choose to be was submissive.

  “I want to give you pleasure. When you found out I was protecting you, it made you feel safe. That’s what I want to do,” he explained as his lips cruised along my jawline, providing evidence that he meant what he said. “I want to show you that I can protect you while showing you the heights of pleasure you’ve never known.”

  I swallowed at the thought of Alexander being in control of my body—at the thought of his hands exploring me and his voice commanding me. He’d proven he was an excellent lover, but could I really give myself to him? Could I trust him not to break me again?

  “I don’t know,” I said, because I didn’t. I couldn’t count on being able to keep my head when it came to Alexander, which meant that I couldn’t count on not making a mistake.

  Alexander’s head dropped to my shoulder in resignation, but when he lifted
it to meet my timid gaze, the passionate fire that burned moments earlier still blazed. “You win.”

  “I do?” I didn’t quite understand.

  “We’ll do it your way, Clara. I want you. I want you any way I can have you.”

  He was relenting—or was this a compromise? I couldn’t fathom what he was offering me. “You agree that I’m not your submissive?”

  “I agree not to push you, Clara—unless you ask me to…” His voice trailed away, leaving something left unsaid. But if he wasn’t going to push me on this, I couldn’t push him either.

  My pulse raced at his confession even as the shock of it wore off. And while my heart thrilled, desire for him pooled in my belly. How long did I have to wait until I could have him again?

  “Soon, poppet,” Alexander promised, tucking a strand of hair behind my ear and kissing the hollow of my neck. “What are your plans this evening?”

  If I was being honest, my plans tonight had involved a good amount of red wine and renting a movie. Now it appeared I was going to be given another option. A familiar voice told me to play hard to get, but I ignored her. I was a starving woman in Alexander’s presence. Only with him here could I see how much I’d missed him.

  “I’m flexible,” I answered.

  Alexander’s mouth curved into a smile. “There’s a thing this evening. Would you go with me?”

  “What kind of thing?” I asked, instantly suspicious.

  “A ball.” He held a finger to my lips. “And before you say no, it is for an excellent cause. We’re raising money for endangered animals. And furthermore, I don’t want to go either.”

  I hesitated. This was more than a date. This was stepping out in the limelight in a very real way. There’d be no denying our relationship after it. Alexander had to know that.